So a little thing........

i am not supose to have this on my head at christmas time............in fact one thing i need is a hug........

you know i have a friend that gives out free hugs, he even carries the sign about town with him.......might see him tonight, try and get a hug then........

anyway, recently ive felt like i havnt realy had much to do, ive had and essay to rite, but its done, ive had an assessment but its done, ive had nothing else to do apart from going to the Arts Center and doing whatever it is i do there, im kinda bored, i really dont know why, i just am, i feel like my life is just getting so boring and that something needs to happen to change it. i want to get into the xmas spirit but i cant i dont know why, perhaps its because i havnt yet done anything christmassy,

you know last year i spent xmas on my own, i had friends around me, who i actually rarely speak to anymore, i had presents to open, but i did in the end spend at least 6 hours on xmas day on my own, it wasnt a nice feeling, but never the less this time last year i was in the christmas spirit very much so, ask anybody, this time last year i was sat with Marc, Alex and a iMac, playing christmas songs and putting up xmas decorations, in fact i actually think i may have just come up with why i cant get in to the xams spirit, maybe its because i actually havnt done anything like this year because im spending it with a new family, a proper family, who invite everybody round to house and have a massive celebration, ive never been part of a big family celebration like this, in fact the only time i ever got to see my family together is at funerals, so im doing xmas differently this year, maybe it will be fun, maybe ill get so drunk i wont remember it, im looking forward to it, it sounds like it always is a good time..................

who knows maybe santa will join us..........